The trailer for 2014′s Robocop premiered earlier this week. Fans of all ages were rightfully perplexed and confused, as the reboot mixed far too many universes: Sucker Punch, DC, Marvel, Robocop, Robotech, Battlestar Galactica, and The Invisible.
Luckily for everyone, Laser Lemming has The Cursed Hero to set things straight. Today, the preview will be analyzed to explain what is really happening.
Understanding Robocop 1:
Above, at 5 seconds into the preview, an Avengers mini-jet flies over both Cylons from the Battlestar Galactica universe and RDF Mechs from Robotech’s Macross Saga. What really threw off most viewers was the fact that the RDF’s were so small, and would stand no chance against the giant Zentradi aliens.
Understanding Robocop 2:
At 21 seconds in, we are introduced to DC’s Earth-16 version of Nick Fury (Samuel L. Jackson). Evidently, Hawkeye never took Fury’s eye in this reality. Also, rather than entering the Age of Ultron, this Nick Fury seems to have entered the government, as DC’s Lex Luther did on Earth-16, and he has unified a force consisting of Cylons and Robotech Mechs rather than using superheroes. As Robocop takes place nearly 20 years after The Avengers, Nick Fury is showing his age well. Earth-16 is relatively unused and its live-action reboot marks the first time we have seen it since the Young Justice cartoon concluded.
Understanding Robocop 3:
This is Kalle (Joel Kinnaman) from the Joel Bergvalle and Simon Sandquist directed The Invisible. He was bullied and nearly died in High School, so it makes sense that he is a cop. Now that he is out of limbo, and can be seen by humans, he appears to be focused on eliminating crime. It is too bad that someone blows him up with a car bomb.
Understanding Robocop 4:
After Kelle goes boom, we are introduced to Earth-16′s version of Commissioner James Gordon (Gary Oldman). He is still involved in law enforcement, but he is a scientist that has mastered Cylon and Robotech technologies. As a result, he places Kelle’s remains into a Cylon body.
Understanding Robocop 5:
Whenever one finds James Gordon (Gary Oldman), no matter the reality or version of Earth, Bruce Wayne (Michael Keaton) will not be far behind. The Earth-16 version of Bruce Wayne, which we were introduced to in Tim Burton’s Batman, has turned into a proper business tycoon. He no longer dons the cowl, but rather he funds James Gordon and Nick Fury’s projects.
Understanding Robocop 6:
Kelle (Joel Kinnaman) has married Sweat Pea (Abbie Cornish) from the Sucker Punch reality, and they have a child. This is a good match, as Kelle was bullied nearly to death and entered limbo, and Sweat Pea was a stripper in an orphanage that fought Steam Nazi robots. Perhaps, she will be upset about marrying a Robot Cop, since she had such a hard time with Nazi Robots in her youth.
In addition, Sweat Pea is very worried about Kelle being late for dinner. When will he learn?! Car bomb, schmar-lomb! Am I right future ladies of cybernetic men? Thus, the trailer wisely shows a lot of Cylons to distract us from Sweat Pea’s nagging.
Understanding Robocop 7:
These are Cylons that have been reconstructed by Nick Fury, James Gordon, and Bruve Wayne. However, these models are neither smizing nor sexy. Where’s future robot Miss J when you need it?
Understanding Robocop 8:
Kelle is now checking himself out in the cyborg get-up. Because he is late for dinner, his human side is perplexed. Will Sweat Pea do a stripper dance and send Kelle into a trance-like reality? There is no doubt that he will fight Robotech Mechs, Cylons, and Avenger mini jets inside that Earth. Win.
Understaning Robocop 9:
Nick Fury barks about making Robo-Kelle, er Robocop more sexy. Bruce Wayne and James Gordon design the Earth-16 version of Batman Beyond, which is a black Cylon with its original red eye panel. Unfortunately, many DC fans were rolling their own eye panels because Robocop now looks like the original version of Azrael’s Bat-Terminator suit, which was built after Bane broke Batman’s back. Regardless, THIS is future sexy. Own it. Yes, like a polaroid picture, Batman Beyond! Good.
Understanding Robocop 10:
The big pay-off is a close-up of the RDF Mechs from Robotech’s Macross Saga. They are much tinier than their animated counter-parts and they also look suspiciously like Robocop’s original clay-animated nemesis, ED-209. RED-F-209, perhaps? Earth-16 is so hard to explain!
Obviously, the big studios are itching to incorporate as many realities as possible into Robocop. DC, Marvel, Robocop, Sucker Punch, Battlestar Galactica, and The Invisible will hopefully provide enough action to save the day from this confusing trailer and shed more light on how this all mixes to a future sexy, Nick Fury stylizied polaroid shaking battle. Cursed Hero… out.
Chris Patton is the writer for Laser Lemming’s movie review blog entitled The Cursed Hero. Read his rodent blog here: https://laserlemming.com/category/blogs/cursedhero/
