Laser Lemming Reviews Justice League: War

The reboot of how the Justice League forms begins with Batman and Green Lantern chasing one of Darkseid’s parademoms. When the Dark Knight uses his grappling gun to latch onto the flying monstrosity, fans will instantly be transported back to the debut of Batman: The Animated Series and the infamous Man-Bat chase. Watching the Dark Knight being dragged helplessly throughout Gotham is an ongoing point of interest in Justice League: War. For, in one of its bat-belt’s compartments is allusions to established DCAU trends, such as an invading alien force being too powerful for humans to fight off alone. However, the other compartments contain altered characteristics.

1For instance, Cyborg is still half human, but his other side is now a mix of nano-tech from Star Labs and Darkseid’s Father Box program. In short, Cyborg becomes Blue Beetle, as his suit now analyzes threats and morphs to counter them. At one point, when Wonder Woman approaches him, his arm transforms into a giant canon and blasts her through a car while his human half is barking for it to stop. His armor is a link between Earth and Apokolipse, much like how the Blue Beetle is the unwilling herald for the Reach on Earth. Thus, within the first 30 minutes one has seen revamped portions of not only Batman: The Animated Series and Young Justice, but several origin stories as well. It’s too much.

cyborgSimilar to how the animated version of Batman: The Dark Knight Returns accompanied Christopher Nolan’s The Dark Knight Rises, Justice League: War is here to familiarize, foreshadow, and reintroduce curious fans to what the 2016 live-action take will taste like. Darkseid will hunt Superman to get at his DNA, which Man of Steel highlighted as containing Kryptonian beings, while the other heroes wreak havoc on mindless robotic armies, just like the Avengers did in New York. It completely erases the wonderful momentum of last year’s Flashpoint Paradox, where Wonder Woman was a balls out Queen that “served” her Amazons by murdering man. Now, Diana is a yelping mess of hormones that declares ice cream a miracle before openly insinuating that she wants to climb Mount Superman. Thus, the latest animated feature from DC isn’t really a reboot. Rather, it’s a pretentious, bloated switcheroo where Cyborg becomes Blue Beetle and Wonder Woman is the Power Puff Girls on Viagra. We won’t even discuss CSI Flash.